Quick Trip to Austin

This trip was three years in the making - and it is certainly different than any trip I have taken before. I’m on my way to meet up with the adoptive family. About three years ago - I was going through a separation - and my husband and his two sons had moved away from my son and I. We were still sorting things out when I found out I was pregnant. Since both he and I had spent years as single parents before getting together, we did not plan to have any more children. When I told him, his stance (like mine) was unchanged. Our youngest was 13 and the idea of starting over with diapers and teething and car seats was a nightmare we both opted out of. With his permission (which I asked for out of consideration - not out of legal requirement) - I began searching for an adoptive family. There were soooo many people longing for children - it was a little overwhelming. I used American Adoptions and the website permitted me to “shop” for a family based on any type of criteria. I included criteria like: together for more than five years, this would be their first child, had a dog, Catholic, at least one of them had gone to college... When I found the family, it was like “this is them!” had been spoken aloud to me. I contacted the agency and got started on the process. (To protect the family’s privacy - I will use A for the mother, B for the father, and * for their son. ) Every interaction I had with American Adoptions was warm and compassionate - and they always checked to make sure I was safe and my needs were met. They constantly reassured me that this was my choice - and could be changed at any time until the paperwork was finalized days after birth. I had a great team through American Adoption - the support was incredible. They organized a call with the adoptive family - and we spoke on the phone briefly. The majority of our communication was done via text and letter. Open adoption is all that is allowed in NY - (snd most states) and I was fine with that - but I explained that I’d like to share pictures and letters/cards and I would like to visit them once - prior to him turning four. My reasoning for this is that psychologically the toddler years are often forgotten - and my presence wouldn’t be a big disruption. Mainly - I wanted to SEE them as a family - each personality interacting with each other - once they had some time to get to know each other. Because we connected so early in the pregnancy - they were able to be on FaceTime for the ultrasound and together we found out I was carrying a boy. The rest of my pregnancy was filled with excitement for them and they came to NY in March - a few weeks earlier than the anticipated due date. They joined me at a routine checkup - and were with me when the doctors said we needed to induce - as the baby was in danger because of hypertension. They were there with me through a long and difficult (PAINFUL) labor - and got to cut the cord and hold him as soon as he was cleaned up. They got their own room at the hospital and we were neighbors for a couple days until they were released to go home. My husband (soon to be ex) and I met with the lawyers days later and the paperwork was signed. I met up to say goodbye before they began the long drive back. Over the years we have kept in touch - we write a few letters each year - and we trade texts on holidays and birthdays. A few months ago I reached out to see when it would be a good time to visit - and this weekend worked for both of us. It’s a short trip - just there and back the next day. We are going to The Thinkery and a park (weather permitting) and I’m meeting his grandparents at a family dinner Saturday night. I will keep you updated!